6 Tips For Discussing Finances with Your Spouse

Finances are a hot-button issue for many couples. Even those who agree on everything can still become wrapped up in money-related arguments. Sharing a bank account and making large purchase decisions comes down to more than money—it’s emotions, values, and priorities. 

Discussing finances with your spouse isn’t always fun. The conversation might be challenging to start. Despite that, open communication is vital to both financial well-being and the health of a marriage.

With a steady approach, you and your spouse can discuss finances in a productive, judgment-free environment. 

Discussing Finances with Your Spouse 


The most crucial element of a productive financial conversation is allowing your partner to speak without judgment. It’s essential to know every detail of your partner’s financial situation, including difficult topics, such as past debts, a low credit score, and other circumstances that could affect your current standing.


Much of the way you think about money was formed by your upbringing. You might manage money similarly to your family or the complete opposite. Whichever category you fall into—or somewhere in between—your values surrounding money have been building for many years. Open a conversation about what has shaped your financial perspective and how that drives the way you spend and save today.


As a couple, what are your financial and personal goals? Identify the central values in your life—present and future—to guide the direction of your conversation. Understanding how you would like your money to serve you will help you and your partner align your focus.


Now that you’ve established your goals, create a plan to achieve those goals together. You and your spouse have the opportunity to align your efforts and make decisions about where you want to put your money, not where you have to put your money. When you are working together to achieve your mutual dream, it can be rewarding to design a plan that will make your ideal future come true.


Open the floor to questions for both sides. You and your spouse may not know larger-scale details about each other’s finances. Here are a few examples of questions you might ask:

  • When do you want to retire? 
  • How do you picture our life after retirement? 
  • Do you ever want to move to a new house? City? 
  • How much of our children’s college do we plan to pay for? 
  • If we had money to spare, what would you prefer we did with it?


As this is a judgment-free zone, be careful not to assign blame to your spouse for financial mistakes or overspending. Instead, have an open conversation about why those mistakes happened and how you can work together to ensure they’re solved and don’t happen again.

Most of All, Remember You’re in this Together

If we were to choose just one tip, it would be to focus on the fact that you’re in this together. When your finances are good, it’s a win for both of you to celebrate. When finances are suffering, it’s an issue for you both to figure out. 

Be compassionate with your partner, asking for the same in return. The more you work together, the better your outcome will be—for both your financial standing and your relationship. If you need an objective opinion or have hit a roadblock, reach out to your financial advisor to help you move forward. 

SageSpring’s family of advisors are here to help. We advise couples like you every day who are striving for a better life and a clear path to their dreams. Your advisor can help you get there. Contact us today to begin planning your best future.

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Jeffrey T. Dobyns


President, SageSpring | Financial Advisor, RJFS 

Jeffrey T. Dobyns

President, SageSpring | Financial Advisor, RJFS

Beyond crunching numbers and investment strategies, at SageSpring, we’re about building relationships. When you encounter Founder & President of SageSpring, Jeff Dobyns, it’s easy to understand why this is at the very heart of who we are as a firm. You won’t find stuffy formalities with Jeff; instead, you can expect to find him sharing a warm smile, communicating a compelling vision, or patiently untangling life’s complex challenges with clients. He believes in truly getting to know clients, understanding their aspirations and priorities, and navigating their financial plans with a tailored, comprehensive approach. Our team members have often been caught taking notes on Jeff’s effortless relationship skills from a distance, and we admire them for striving to learn from one of the best. 

Jeff’s financial expertise and wisdom are the perfect match to his innate people skills. Jeff holds the prestigious CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNERTM certification, Chartered Life Underwriter (CLU®), and Chartered Financial Consultant (ChLU®) designations, and has held executive positions with financial planning firms for more than two decades. 

His dedication extends beyond the office to the boardroom and the local community, where Jeff is passionate about giving back. He serves as Chairman of the Board of Men of Valor, a prison ministry and mentoring program. Jeff also serves on the board of Send Musicians to Prison, which shares hope, healing and restoration with the imprisoned through musicians & artists. Jeff actively supports other initiatives in the community by sitting on the board of The Signatry of Middle Tennessee and the Halftime Institute of Nashville. 

Witnessing his four children, Gracyn, Hunter, Tanner, and Logan, excel on the field is almost just as rewarding, if not more, than celebrating the victories of seeing his clients overcome obstacles and build wealth. Spending weekends boating on the lake, hiking mountain trails, and fishing with his family are the moments Jeff cherishes most. It’s this grounded perspective that reveals the true meaning of wealth for Jeff: not just numbers on a page, but the freedom to create experiences that enrich your life and the lives of those you love. When you choose the Dobyns McMillin Wealth Team, you choose more than financial expertise. You choose a partner who champions your dreams, celebrates your victories, and walks besides you on the path to achieving your unique goals.

**Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP®, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER TM, CFP® (with plaque design) and CFP® (with flame design) in the U.S., which it awards to individuals who successfully complete CFP Board’s initial and ongoing certification requirements.